When you’re in your mid-30’s or older, it can seem as if your all your peers are married or in a relationship. Some may even have a family. If you are seeking a committed relationship, the dating scene can be tough. And that goes for ANY age group. The pool of eligible singles may seem so limited that you may wonder if you’ll be single for life.
Over the years of singlehood, even holidays can feel lonely even when among friends and family. I’ve wallowed in self-pity and tried everything to make the most out of singledom.
Speed dating? Check! Celebrating “Galentine’s Day” on Valentine’s Day with my gal pals? Check! But soon, those gals were no longer single.
Here are 5 tips on dating to meet Mr. Right when you are in your mid-30’s.
1. Be intentional:
In today’s world of instant gratification and swiping left/right, it’s important to be intentional. Putting a little effort in upfront can save you a ton of time and energy later down the line.
Specifically, find out what things are going on and available in your area. Think outside the box too! What have you always wanted to try? Where have you always wanted to visit?
When you are enjoying your life and raising your vibrations, others can sense the good energy. So what events and activities are of interest to you?
Selecting things that you are personally interested in has many other benefits too. You will not only have more fun, but will also be most successful meeting people.
2. Be mindful of your time + energy:
This goes hand-in-hand with being intentional about your activities. No one likes to waste their time and energy. After all, time is money. Money is energy!
If you’re not into someone, nip it in the bud. Be firm, final and friendly about it. None of this ghosting stuff. You’re in your mid-30’s...show some respect!
Good communication is crucial to any relationship. When you’re dating in your 30s, you should be able to talk to the person openly and honestly.
Even if you don’t plan on seeing the person again, being open and honest is a good characteristic to build upon for any relationship. In a personal and professional setting.
Life is too short. Be mindful of not only your time and energy, but also other people’s.
3. Choose fun:
What’s the point of seeking Mr. Right and being in a relationship if you’re not having fun? After all, happiness is the journey, not the destination.
As humans, it’s easy to get caught up in comparing ourselves to our peers who seem to be ahead in the game of life. It can be dangerous to adopt a scarcity mindset and focus on the things you don’t have yet.
So what if you haven’t met the one. Wanting a healthy and fulfilling partnership is great. However, giving your date the third degree to see if they have what it takes to fulfill your expectations is off putting.
Focus on having fun and getting to know the person. Dating shouldn’t be depressing. If it starts feeling like a chore, then you may want to take a step back and re-think tip #1.
Remember to focus on the present!
By our mid-30’s, we have all had our share of heartbreak. Breakups can be painful and downright awful.
Yet, it’s time to leave the past in the past. We’ve all made mistakes and we’ve all been hurt. But it doesn’t mean we have to relive it over and over by retelling it over and over.
Your past has shaped who you are, but it’s your past—not your present or future. Instead, release the past. Focus on what is happening now and look where you are going next.
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